Well I have decided that my blog is sort of like my journal. This morning I watched the movies I made for my kids and my husband and I never thought I could ever love anyone so unconditionally as I love my mom and dad and brothers and sister. But I do. I have been on a detox for my body so I can loose weight. I have already lost 4 pounds. We went to the temple earlier this week and did some endowments for my husbands dead family. It was nice to see the temple, I don't know how to explain it but when I go to the temple it always makes me feel like everything I've been feeling just goes away. Even though it doesn't it feels that way when I'm in the temple. If only I could stay there all day. I talk to my family in California yesterday and that was nice. Even though I can't see my family every day I am glad for cell phones so I can at least talk to them every day if I want to. I even talked to my brothers new girlfriend. She seems really nice and I even found out her parents live in Utah and friends that live in the same place we do. So hopefully this means that he will come visit. We will see. I'm going to have something to eat before we go to church.

I have  decided instead of making my sister or friends listen to all my problems, I'll just write them down on my blog. I feel better when I write it down. I feel like I have been putting on weight because with my husband not having work and always being home makes me feel so lazy. Plus since I'm home I'm always snacking. So I guess my husband has been sending out his resume but it looks as if Utah is not hiring because all the response he has got back is New York and New Orleans. So now I'm getting a little stressed out. When I talk about it I start really thinking about our situation and look at how bad it is. It's just times like this that I wish I had family that lived in Utah. I wish I could see my family more than I do. It's very different after I got married because my family and extended family would get together all the time. But I guess since everyone lives so far from everybody else it's  more difficult. Well I'm so sorry if this sounds like a pity party. So I will give you information on my kids. My oldest is getting so grown up it seems to me like just the other day we were bringing him home from the hospital after he was born. Now for my next oldest I can remember bringing him home from the hospital not for being born but for having a busted lip for falling off his booster seat. Now for my last and final child, I remember being so glad to come home from the hospital and to have all my kids at home. I am so glad to have them and thank God for them everyday!

Well here I am again! A new day has come, and here I am writing on my blog again. Things are better like my sister told me we all have to go through rough times. I am so glad when I'm happy I don't like to be down and depressed. Saturday I took my boys to get hair cuts and of course my daughter wanted her hair cut so all of my kids got hair cuts. My oldest is changing from a boy to a Man. That's very interesting. We have had the talk from some papers his doctor gave me. I thought my son was going to die and kept asking if I was done so he could watch T.V. That made me sort of happy but I rather him hear it from me than someone else. So if he has questions he'll come to me hopefully. I saw a good movie on Saturday but it was long and my husband even watched it with me. The movie was "Australia" with Nicole Kidman. I really liked it. We had a friend over on Saturday who said he would start me on a diet. I asked him where I should be weight wise and he told me about 115 or 120. So I hope it is helping I go to the gym 3 times a week. I want to get a better eating habit or just start eating more healthy. Well I better go to have F.H.E. So until next  time. 

Well hello strangers! Well let me keep you updated on everything that has been going on with our lives. The boys have been playing basketball since January but it is now coming to an end. Even though the boys were on different teams they loved playing and want to play next year. Which well be better for me because they will be in the same age group and on the same team. But now it is time for baseball and they will be on the same team. But Arianna wants to play soccer this year so we are just waiting for the sign ups. My husband is going to start school in May. I have been such a source of faith for my husband since his work has been slow for the last little while. Just reminding him this is how it usually is this time of the year, and it always picks up. But yesterday I just had a melt down thinking that everything wasn't going to work out like it always does. I hate having undeniable faith and letting the devil work his way in and have me question my faith. I remember the last time this happened it was the fast sunday after my brother was killed in a car accident. I was walking up to bare my testimony, and I started to doubt and question everything I'd ever borne in my testimonies ever before. I want to be able to not go through this anymore because it makes me feel so bad and terrible, and it makes me feel like I'm contradicting myself after making my husband start to believe because of my faith and belief. If anybody reading this has any advice I would love to hear it and gladly except it. I try to be strong for friends and family. But I guess  we all need help sometimes. I just wish I didn't have to have this as one of my trials. I need to go and make dinner for my family. Hopefully I can be more current on my blog. It's easier to write my feelings than talk about them. So until next time. 

Well Christmas is over and Santa was very good to us this year. The weekend before Christmas we spent it celebrating with my husbands brothers and sisters in Logan along with his parents and his Aunt. Then on Monday the 22 my daughter had a dance recital. She loved it and loves dance. Yesterday my in-laws came over at night we had dinner and opened more presents. I hope everyone reading this had a very merry Christmas and will have a Happy New Year, may god keep you and yours safe in the year to come!

I didn't realize how much sacrifice and running around it took to have older kids. With sports and school activities plus church stuff. I guess you really can tell if you love your kids or anyone for that matter, if you are willing to sacrifice things for them. When we were down in California for Thanksgiving my sister and her family, my mom and dad, plus our family went to Disneyland. When my husband took the boys on some rides. The rest of us took the girls to see tinkerbell and her friends. For how long the line was I was expecting something spectacular. But there wasn't so after that my sister and I took our oldest girls on Space Mountain. Which was a treat for the moms. That is my absolute favorite roller coaster at Disneyland. At the end of the ride they take our picture and if it didn't cost an arm and a leg that would of been a picture worth keeping. My sisters daughter looked like she was scared to death my daughter had her head down my sister was smiling and it looked as if the speed was pulling the skin on my face back. Oh the memories we will have. I love spending time with all of my family. I am hoping they all can come to Utah next November for Thanksgiving and for when my son gets the priesthood. Well I need to go fix dinner for my family.

I'm back it has been so crazy in my life. Let me fill you in. I will start off with some good news I got a new car sold our van to our neighbors. It is so nice driving a car again, it has been at least 6 or 7 years. We had family pictures taken by my sister in law. We went to California to visit my family for Thanksgiving. It was so nice seeing my brother and sister and their families. I was so surprised how well all the kids got along. It just goes to show that my babies are growing up. We got home on Tuesday my neighbor pick us up and dropped us off at the airport. I can not thank them enough. Early Thursday morning I woke up and decided to go look for something of Robert's couldn't find it so went to ask him if he had it. When I turned on the light I saw two piles of throw up on his floor. I have to admit something throw up and I don't go together so I woke up Rob and asked him to help. He did, and while we were cleaning it up my other son woke up  to go the bathroom. He came into my oldest son's room to ask what we were doing we told him what happened and he went back to bed. We cleaned it up and we all went back to bed. Not more than 2 minutes later someone threw up again. Thought it was the same son but when I woke up I found out it was the other one. So we cleaned that one up and went to bed. It must of been a 24 hour thing because they didn't throw up again and they were both tired but went to school. The next morning I took my youngest son to an orthodontist consultation. The good news is that he probably will not need braces for a year or two and his x-rays doesn't show him having any wisdom teeth. The bad news is that he has an extra front tooth which will need to be pulled. Yesterday the kids had a movie night at church so I was already in my p.j.'s. I had to go inside and get them and then found out my boys couldn't leave until they picked up all the popcorn from their popcorn fight. Next time I write I'll tell you about our trip to Disneyland. The good news is that I didn't lose my family with my niece like I did at Lego Land in California.